Been here since Friday morning and I finally get a chance to write! I have had a helluva lot to do and not much time to sleep in between. Oh well. That’s how vacations are sometimes. All play and no rest. But I’ll find some of that really soon.
So peep this… it’s Wednesday night and I figure I’ll just wear what’s comfiest for a long flight and easiest to remove and put back on because you know how it is at those security checkpoints in the airport? You pretty much get naked before they let you in. So I get there and pick up a couple of bins to put my shit in. I remove my sandals to put in one of the bins and I smell this whiff of really bad vinegary feet. Oh God was I freakin’ out! I was like… I swear these sandals haven’t made my feet stink before. Fuck! And it’s not like you can hide this smell. It was SOOO strong. So I leaned forward to pretend like I was checking my laptop but I was really checking my sandals. Slick huh? I couldn’t really catch a good sniff though. So I bent down slowly to smell my feet instead like that wasn’t obvious. And man… I wanted to vomit. So I slowly looked around then looked up at the guy behind me and he looked so embarrassed. Cuz it was him! And he knew what I was doing too! He was standing a few feet behind me and he had one foot on top of another with his toes kinda tucked in (like that was gonna help), and I made this relieved face as I exhaled and was like… “Sorry Dawg”. (Had to share that moment)
Back to the Philippines… I’m here now obviously. The weather isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. It’s been raining on and off every few hours for half hour spurts. The humidity is pretty bad though. Even when the sun isn’t showing, you can still feel the heat like you’re in a sauna. Typical tropical weather. There isn’t a lot of sun though which is whack. I’ll never get a tan this way! But it’s still refreshing (did I just say refreshing?) from the even hotter weather I left behind. It’s the rain I like because I’ve missed it so much from not having any in LA. Jealous?
My relatives were all happy to see me. It was a really nice homecoming. I had a huge breakfast waiting for me and I LOVE Pilipino breakfasts. Yum! And since that morning, I feel like I haven’t stopped eating. I swear we eat like 8 times a day. And it doesn’t help that they said I got fat. “Oh, you’re even fatter now!” That’s just great. I knew they would say that! Really helps the ego you know. But one of the helpers here said I look thinner. Sweet! Thanks relatives, I’m taking your gifts back and giving them all to her.
So far, I’ve had a massage, been to a comedy club, went to the Mall of Asia, booked a week long trip to Bangkok, went to a bar, went to a car show, bet on horse races (didn’t win), played the Lotto (didn’t win either), booked another day to enter my favorite game show Wowowee! (hoping to win… with the hostess) and ate and ate and ate. I’m beat!
I did finally get a full night of sleep cuz my cousin’s are just as tired. I have no jetlag either. Cuz who suffers from jetlag on their vacation? Guess they can’t keep up with this American! Though the mosquitoes can! Damn mosquitoes.
One last thing... I was at a comedy club my first night here. And you know how some places have valets in the restrooms? I hate valets unless they park my car. Cuz really, why do you need someone to help you out in there? They practically ruin your whole experience (not that it’s an experience to pee) cuz it’s like they’re watching you do your thing (which makes this an experience). And then they walk you to an open sink, put soap on your hands, spray cologne on you and dry your hands. It’s like a nagging insect you can’t seem to shoo away. You just have to go with it cuz it’s there. But this insect gave me a neck and shoulder massage after washing my hands. Now that’s gotta be the coolest thing ever! I ended up staying in the restroom (or comfort room as it’s referred to here) for an extra five minutes. Kinda weird in the restroom I know but this is the Philippines. That was worth a dollar tip!
5 comments:
nice recap...smelly feet and all... are you sure it wasn't you?
think they may have something there with the bathroom attendents... peeps in the pampered zones of clubs would love that... lol
more pictures please!
Nothing worse than stanky feet but good thing you didn't have to sit next to him on the long flight! Can you imagine? 16 hours (or however long it takes). Sick!
Thanks for sharing that though. First thing I read this morning. Nice.
Yes, more pictures please!
OMG that airport story was so unnecessary...but thanks for sharing! LOL
You're such a great storyteller. I about fell out of my chair when I read about your foul order experience at the airport! That was hilarious! I miss you mucho! COME BACK HOME! xoxo
Dude, the resort looks sweet!! I can't wait to go back to the PI, although I don't know when that will be. Glad to hear that you're having fun. Can't wait to hear about your other stories. Oh, and you look pretty fit in the pictures. Working out during your vacation to impress the ladies???
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